Every so often, somebody who calls
him or herself a ‘researcher’ or a ‘journalist’ tries to link me to one or
other unsolved political assassination.
Just yesterday again, I received
communication from one such person—a Swedish aid worker nonetheless—who had
been brought under the impression—or who had brought himself under the
impression—that I held the answer, or had in-depth, secret knowledge of yet
another such covert and dastardly deed. The reasoning appears to be that if
anything happened in Africa, and I live and work in Africa, then I am either
involved or have in-depth knowledge of whatever it is I am to be blamed for.
Still, that forced me to wrack my
brains to recall my whereabouts on 18 September 1961, the day of the mysterious
plane crash death of the Swedish diplomat Dag Hammarskjöld in Zambia—then
Northern Rhodesia.
Luckily it was not too difficult. Since
I was five years old at the time, I was in Botswana (then known as
Bechuanaland) probably hunting birds with a pellet gun or playing in a pool of
mud. Thus, I am fairly satisfied that—despite my tendency to wander about unsupervised
by my parents—I would not have made it across the two different borders and
shot his plane out of the sky without anybody noticing.
But somebody must think I have unresolved
anger issues with Swedes as he is not the only Swede I have been accused of
sending to his Maker prematurely.
Over the past 20 years, there have
been persistent attempts to link me to the assassination of former Swedish
Premier Olof Palme. That was in Stockholm on 28 February 1986.
My alibi for the above assassination
is so boring that I will just pretend that I was at a top secret location in Switzerland
having my fingerprints burnt-off after having been falsely accused of the 1983
suicide bombing of the US embassy in Beirut.
However, I must confess publicly,
that unfortunately I do not have an alibi for the poisoning of Alexander the
Great. But with the way the insinuations are flying, I shall have to make an urgent
appointment with a hypnotherapist and have myself regressed to a previous life
in 323 B.C. so that I can cobble together another defence.
Meanwhile, if any of you have any
knowledge of my whereabouts at the time of any other unsolved assassinations or
downing of aircraft, please forward the details to me. It will save me much
time and effort.
